Around 2:30 pm yesterday, I suddenly stumbled into a period where I couldn’t cope. Where everything converged and I truly felt like I might fall apart. Within half an hour I found out that my great-aunt was in the hospital and that a job application process I’ve been in hit a stumbling block. I couldn’t quite finish up my thesis and the paper that’s due tomorrow night was still looming, mostly untouched. To top it all off, there has suddenly been some movement in my dating/relationship life that is really terrific, but has also been taking up a lot of mental space.
When I realized that I could no longer deal, I retreated to my bed for a nap and a little recovery. I crawled under the covers and spent some breathing deeply and focusing on relaxing each part of my body, starting with my toes. I found myself to a floaty, less jangly place and drifted off to sleep for about a half hour. I woke up having shifted back into a place where all things are manageable, which was a great relief.
I still don’t know what’s happening with my aunt, but my cousins have stepped in to take care of her and I feel great relief that she’s not going to be alone anymore. The job hunt is going on the back burner until I get all the school pieces wrapped up and tucked away.
The thesis is done. I still have to print it out, get some signatures and otherwise jump through some hoops, but content-wise, it is all finished and formatted into a single, cohesive document.
I’m still dragging myself through the final paper of grad school. It is something of a slog, especially since I didn’t adore this class and so don’t have much enthusiasm for it. However, I will get through it.
And the dating thing? It’s there, as something to look forward to when this last paper is done!