So, I’m feeling kind of down. This isn’t how I want to be, but I’m not entirely sure how to make it go away.
I’m having a little disappointment about the new job. It’s really feeling like I made a lateral move, not the step up that I was going for. Maybe this is the way I’m supposed to feel in the first week, when I don’t have much responsibility besides changing minutia on a draft website, copying and pasting inquiry emails into word documents and sending expense reports to the right person. But I guess I was hoping for more, and that more isn’t readily apparent yet. I felt so hopeful about this opportunity before it started, and right now I’m not feeling anything but deflation.
I have a killer sore throat, but I mentioned that yesterday, no use in repeating, when I’ve got all sorts of other wonderful things to complain about.
I’m feeling pretty discouraged by the whole dating thing these days. I don’t reallly have anthing to say about this that hasn’t been said 101 times before on 87 blogs by writers better than I. Not to mention the books, moves, tv shows and magazine articles that beaten the dating and love topic to death. I know all the stuff about how you have to surrender to it. That when you finally stopping caring, that’s when you’ll meet someone. But I gotta say, I’m so far away from not caring, I’m not sure if I’ll ever get there. Personally, I think that the people who say that they really don’t care are full of shit. I’m tired of the dating and discomfort. I’m want ease, intimacy and familiarity. It’s been over a year since I’ve had it, and I really miss it.
Lastly, I’m sad that I’m missing my sister’s CD release party next weekend. Check out www.rainarose.com for the scoop on “Despite the Crushing Weight of Gravity.”