Today I was asked to deliver a project manual to a building on the far side of campus. The faculty member’s office to whom I was delivering is on the same floor as some folks I used to work with through a multi-school program at my last job. They always treated me wonderfully, and are one of the major things I miss about that position. I was waiting for the elevator, ready to get on, when Kelly got off. She greeted me with a cheerful hi, and asked how things were going. I couldn’t stop the emotion from filling my voice when I explained that things were not going as well as I had hoped, and that I’ve hit a crossroads with work that is making me feel like the only option is selling my apartment and going to hide out in Indonesia for six months.
She blinked and asked, “why Indonesia?” She shook her hand at me and said in her Jewish-mama tone, “this is only a blip. I know it feels overwhelming at the moment, but when you look back on it, you’ll realize that it was only a very small blip, in a lifetime of blips. If you want to sit down and do some talking about your career, I would be happy to try and help you work out some things.”
It was the first time that anyone had actually suggested that they would be interested in helping me figure all this out, and for that moment, I felt saved, as if someone had scooted a life raft in my direction. In one big whoosh, her offer of help shifted my perspective a little and helped me remember that my life will be long, and will be filled with many good things. It was amazing how much it helped.
And now, I’m escaping, heading to the wilds of New York City, to spend the weekend with my cousins in Brooklyn. We’re going to a protest march tomorrow, followed by a visit to Ellis Island. Sunday I’m going to try to catch latihan with the New York Subud group and then head home in the afternoon. Should be fun!